There is a question I have been pondering during Holy Week. “I will be happy if ____________.”  Early in my dad’s cancer journey, he would have placed his happiness dependent upon his cure. He really wanted to be cured from cancer. He wanted to be free from the treatments that left him sick and oppressed, the trips to the doctor, and the countless nagging distractions, discomforts and hardship cancer brings.

I wonder how his life would have been different had he been cured. Would he have experienced the happiness he longed for in the cure?

My belief talking with him as he began to change his mindset about happiness, is that Dad realized his internal happiness was not dependent upon cancer’s cure.

Dad believed happiness sprung from inner joy gifted by the Holy Spirit. Some of the happiest times of his life came after touching and profound interactions with God in prayer. He would call me with tears streaming down his cheeks with such abundant joy.

I understand this now. How often I would fill in this happiness sentence with success for NBC Camps or for my children or for getting my way in some capacity.

I am learning together with Dad that inner happiness cannot not be reached by an external means. Nothing material, physical, temporary can fill the space created deep within each of us designed solely for holy and godly communion.

That is how we face difficult life situations with overflowing inner joy. To live in the house of ambition leaves us constantly empty. To live in the house of anxiety and pressure is a choice.

God invites us to live in the house of love where His hope is gifted to us.  Do I run to what I think will satisfy or will I run into the arms of a deeply loving Heavenly Father?

“You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.” – Psalm 16:11

SHARE IT: