My car was turned the wrong direction when we were leaving the house. It was facing the direction leading to my mom and dad’s home. The other direction is a faster route to the main road and the one we always use. My family encouraged me to do a U-turn but instead I felt compelled to drive by Mom and Dad’s old home. When they lived there it was full of light and festively decorated for Christmas. As I drove by the house it was dark again. There is no American flag, Christmas lights, or welcome wreath. I don’t think the new owners are there often.  

I felt profoundly sad when I saw the dark house. I immediately regretted driving by to see it. I missed the light of the home and especially the light of my dad, the joy of his life and what an incredible friend and father he was. I felt great sorrow. 

The car, as usual when all of us are in it, was full of music and playing louder than I like. My family loves music. Typically, I turn down the volume and then I am asked to turn it back up. I am happy to do this because I love LOVE. I love everyone delighting to be together and music is part of the fun.  

In my sorrow, I instinctively turned the music almost completely off. My husband Shann had been watching me. He knew I was sad to see my mom and dad’s home. He said, “You turned off the song when you needed to hear it the most. The entire song is building to this point and the message is just what your dad wants you to hear.” The song was King of Kings sung by Brooke Ligertwood.  

For the Lamb had conquered death 

 And the dead rose from their tombs 

 And the angels stood in awe 

 For the souls of all who’d come 

 To the Father are restored 

And the church of Christ was born 

Then the Spirit lit the flame 

 Now this gospel truth of old 

 Shall not kneel, shall not faint 

 By His blood and in His name 

 In His freedom I am free 

 For the love of Jesus Christ 

 Who has resurrected me 

I cried as I listened to the song. I looked at Shann, tears ran down his face. He smiled at me and touched my hand as we cried together. Then I remembered what in my grief I had forgotten. My grief had turned me toward despair, but the song pointed me back to joy. I will see my dad again. Dad is alive and resurrected in Christ as we all who believe shall be. 

So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you. – John 16:22

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