I am back writing Words of Hope for the remainder of the year. I took a lengthy break for several reasons. Mostly because I was sad. Grief is complex that way. It has twists and turns that brings surprise, as well as humility and awe.

I don’t like loss and pain, and death deeply troubles me. I miss my dad. I miss his voice, his calls, and friendship. As an empty nester, loss is difficult to bear. I miss my girls. I miss the energy, singing, and spunk of having them in my home.

I miss the lighter, more insouciant ways of a less complicated life. I have been sojourning in a metaphorical wilderness and find I am emerging back to a familiar path and life rhythm. Emerging with more sorrow rather than less, and I find this is okay. Jesus was called a “Man of Sorrows” and acquainted with grief, but I also think of Jesus as happy, laughing often, attentive, and curious. He is infinitely patient with those who frustrate others and infinitely impatient with those who believe they know God and have all the answers. Maybe acquaintance with grief amplifies this.

Grief has stripped away comforts and accentuated my crutches. I am thankful for this time, and I am thankful for the times when I have directly heard my dad speak. I am even thankful for the times I struggle to remember his face, not his photo image but his living, breathing, alive presence.

As I restart Words of Hope, the focus will be an invitation together to consider how to live with greater attentiveness, gratitude, presence, and joy. This was my dad’s daily struggle with cancer, and it has been my struggle with grief and the dramatic changes of life. Whatever road you are on, I pray that this space can be one for listening, transformation, peace, and hope.

Love and joy of Christ for all!

Jennifer

“There is a season for every activity under heaven.” – Ecclesiastes 3 

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