SEE, I TOLD YOU I LOVED YOU
37 years ago I discovered for the first time God loved Fred Crowell.
February 3 1979, was a great day for Susie and Fred Crowell. The Bulldogs of Samford University got a win on the basketball court. After the game, Susie said, “It’s time to go to the hospital the baby is coming.”
Jennifer was 10 years old. For years the Crowell’s tried to add a second miracle to the family. It was discouraging when we finally accepted the doctor’s view that there would be no more children.
Susie, always up before dawn, with Bible on her lap and a cup of coffee at her side, was reading Psalm 20 on a winter morning in 1977. Not given to emotional decision-making Susie had a profound impression she was not only going to get pregnant; she was going to have a boy.
Very carefully Susie added b.o.y. alongside Psalm 20 to her already marked up Bible. She placed a period after each letter so that it would not read boy. This was her secret and her’s alone.
February 4 came early for the Crowell’s. The baby was happy with its home and refused too come out. I say “it” because we did not know we were getting a boy or girl. I should say I did not know. Susie, in her heart, knew but she had not told me.
It was a long, difficult delivery. After about 12 hours a Jay popped into our world, My first conscious thought was, “See I told you I loved you.” At that time God spoke to me through my own mind and thoughts, not loud words.
Time doesn’t permit me to expand upon the relationship parallel between God, our Abba Father and the relationship of a father and child, so let me be succinct. As children mature at the subconscious level, they see their earthly father the same way they view God.
Thus for me, my father was angry, unpredictable and unreliable. Therefore I viewed God in a similar manner. I never prayed to God. I went to Jesus. Thankfully today Abba Father is my joy and my delight. It has been a long journey to get to this beautiful place.
Jay’s birth was the beginning of a transformation in my relationship with God. Jay Crowell is 37 today. Jay is my hero for so many, many reasons. The goal of any father should be to see his children become more than he could ever be. Jay has become more than me. Jay brings God honor. Jay brings me honor far beyond what I ever expected or deserve.
Psalm 20 is worthy of memorization. As I fight the cancer battle I thank My God for His many promises in Psalm 20.
