“Better to trust and run the risk of being disappointed than to trust no one and be alone.” – Jim Harrick

In a recent conversation, it was communicated to me that trust was a big problem. I asked this person who they trusted. After a long pause, my friend named two people he hardly knew.

Who do you trust someone? What makes them trustworthy?  

Solomon tells us of another example of meaningless under the sun. He speaks of the person who is all alone. Reminds me of the lady who left millions for her cats.

Companionship is a gift. Those people in our inner circle are crucial. These are the ones who are there for us in health and in sickness. They are there when you have nothing to give back.

Treasure these companionships. Give them the first fruits of your time, your energy and even some of your treasure.

Years ago a friend lost a high powered job. He became very depressed. I was motivated to call him often; as much as once a week. I was concerned for him.

After a year he got a great job. The news came out on a Friday. By Monday I had 10 recordings asking me to call my friend to put in a good word for them to work for him.

My friend told me, “During the year it was like I had leprosy. My friends disappeared.”  

I asked each of the 10 callers one question. “In the past year did you call or write my friend a letter when he was down?”

In all 10 cases, the answer was, “No.”

My response was, “Sorry I can’t help you.”

Companionship is simple. Make sure you follow the 7 to 10 rule. In 7 of your contacts, you ask for nothing. You can have 3 asks for every 10 contacts.

The closer you get to a 50 – 50 give and take relationship the better.

Avoid, at all costs, this mentality if you want companionship. “How come you haven’t called me?” Make the call if you want to talk. It will become clear if they do not wish your companionship.

If this is the case give them a break. Maybe they have something going on in their life that prevents them from having a close companionship with you.

To illustrate this point. Cancer has shrunk my world, my companionships. Some of my friends love me but they can’t deal with pain so they don’t call or write. This is ok.

Further, there are many days my energy level is very low. These days it is winning the moment so I can win the hour. There is no energy except to do the “have to” of NBC and home.

No longer do I try to send 10 encouragements a day. Words of Hope is my one way of letting my lifelong companions know I love them and that I care.

As Stevie Wonder sings so beautifully “I just called to say I love you. I just called to say I care.”

Well, I just wrote these words to say I love you. I just wrote to say I care.


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