Easy Adjustment

Adjustment is such an important skill in relationships. I picture Dad with his injured neck. He could not easily adjust his posture or his point of view without pain. This is a perfect metaphor for injured relationships, they are almost impossible to move. Because of this, we find many relationships carefully navigating each other (walking around issues, disagreements, preferences) like they are walking on eggshells.

There is a grace and ease to a beautiful relationship where conflict, disagreement, and preferences work to enhance the friendship rather than make it more fragile. I imagine dancing and the adjustment that is created through the music and movement together building greater flexibility, sensitivity, movement, and joy.

Today, as I was praying through 2 Corinthians 3:16-18, I paused on each word and prayed for someone. I love these verses as reminders of our relationship with God though Christ. I picture this relationship with Jesus as impacting all other relationships. As I was going slowly, I got to the spot, “Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is…..” I couldn’t remember the word. I thought for sure it was peace, but it wasn’t. The word is freedom. “Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” What a perfect word to describe God in the center of a loving relationship. This is the beauty of a relationship that can be lovingly persuaded and adjusted by the beloved other. We don’t have to double down on our point of view, we don’t have to get angry to get our way, we defer to love, we defer to truth, we defer to the Spirit who brings freedom.

Most of the time, Dad was infinitely adjustable. “Hey Dad, can you put down your phone and hear a short story? Hey Dad, your tone of voice was a bit abrupt, can you notice this? Hey Dad, what do you think about this topic, I think this about it.”

As we both entered our friendship together with the willingness and surrender to be adjusted (maybe not in our opinions but in the intensity of our proponent of our opinions), we allowed the Spirit of God to give us greater relational freedom unencumbered by bitterness, division, or blame. The Spirit of the Lord allows us to live in relational freedom.

“But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” 2 Corinthians 3:16-17